How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Randomize