have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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