By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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