I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
