Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
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Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
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pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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