i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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