this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
