i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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