I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
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The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
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Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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