just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
