he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
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Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
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i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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