That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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