Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
