well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Never joke about your clitoris.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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