dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then my night got REAL pukey
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
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