sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
