Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
