Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
It's official drugs can't kill me
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Randomize
