just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Randomize