Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
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