Quick, to the slutcave!
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
