Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize
