the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize