She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Randomize
