Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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