Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Randomize
