hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
i need some magic done to my vagina
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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