I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
