like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
