girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I cut my penus on the lid.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
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