I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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