dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
