I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Randomize
