What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
