you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
