Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
