a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
