I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
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I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
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Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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