Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I understand Curling. That high.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
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