last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
