Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
You took a bar mat shot.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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