I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
