plz talk dirty to me
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Randomize
