what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
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