I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
