So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
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just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
You took a bar mat shot.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
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I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.