sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
