discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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