im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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