you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Panties = found
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