everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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